


i'm at home in the clouds, and towering over your head

by americanarry



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: IM JUST REALLY SAD RIGHT NOW, ITS ALSO A LITTLE BORING, LUKES NAME IS LITERALLY SAID ONCE, M/M, THIS REALLY SUCKS IM SO MAD AT MYSELF, This is really sad, and kind of short, i think I might do a second part just for closure and I'll make it less sad, im so so sorry, it doesn't mention it but it's implied, kind of, suicide TW, this is third person but all calum, trigger warning, wow this is so bad I'm so sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-16
Updated: 2015-01-16
Packaged: 2018-03-07 19:42:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3180791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/americanarry/pseuds/americanarry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the room was dark and normally he's scared of being alone in the dark. however, he can't imagine being in a dark room with anyone else beside the one person that he can't possibly be with.<br/>or, calum is grieving over luke.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i'm at home in the clouds, and towering over your head

**Author's Note:**

> ok I'm warning you this is really sad if you didn't read the tags. and it really sucks. I'm just really sad I don't know why I wrote this.  
> it's like 6 in the morning  
> the title is obviously from remembering sunday by all time low  
> the quote at the end is from a text post from tumblr and the whole thing is basically based of of that.

calum sat in his room, on his bed staring at the wall across from him. the air around him was still and the only sound he could hear was the pounding of his blood in his ears.  
 _it's hard to hear anything that isn't his voice._  
every time he blinked, his eyes burned from the lack of tears because all he could do was cry the past _27 hours_ and now there's nothing left.  
 _absolutely nothing left inside of me._  
the room was dark and normally he's scared of being alone in the dark. however, he can't imagine being in a dark room with anyone else beside the one person that he can't possibly be with.  
he couldn't bring himself to move, because he had nothing to move for. he stared at the wall until the burning in his eyes became unbearable and he cast his eyes down to his hands.  
the lingering touch of _his_ hand was fading and that fact made the constant pain in his chest even more prominent.  
 _why._  
that word repeated in his head several times, and it wasn't even stated as a question anymore.  
 _I don't have enough energy for questions._  
it repeated so much that it lost the meaning so all he could think to himself was just _why why why why why_ but there was no answer and he didn't expect one.  
maybe the reason he can't expect an answer is because he can't _think_ of one.  
why on earth would this happen? why would it come to this? why would he leave?  
he was in denial so he knows the anger will come soon, that's the next stage, right? it's just a matter of time before he kicks things and throws stuff across the room.  
calum finally stands from his seat from the edge of his bed, his legs being stiff from sitting so long.  
he turns to the mirror on the adjacent wall and accidentally sees his own reflection.  
his hair is anything pleasant looking and there's dark circles under his eyes from the lack of sleep.  
the anger kicks in and he swings his fist into the door of his room, leaving a dent in it and his hand is numb.  
he leans his forehead to the door and both of his arms. if he could cry right now, he would.  
he needs to walk outside or something, he's been locked in his room for countless hours staring at the wall. when he walks outside the sky is still black and he just keeps walking down the sidewalk, with no destination in mind. he just keeps walking until he subconsciously ends up at _his_ spot.  
 _luke's infamous spot._  
the swingset seems even more rusted and useless than usually.  
calum can't bring himself to sit on one of the swings to disturb the stillness, so he just sinks to the ground.  
calum's grateful for the fresh air in his lungs and cool wind as opposed to the stuffiness of his bedroom. and it's nice to see the stars after staring at the wall for over 12 hours.  
 **"there may be stars in the sky, wind in the air, and sun in the clouds, but without him I don't want it."**


End file.
